A timid hotel chambermaid,
Of burglars was so much afraid,
She looked under the bed
Saw a mouse there instead.
And the guests quite enjoyed the parade.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 1 May 1910. panel 2.]

A young married lady named Rowe,
Hired a butler, quite English, you know,
While attempting to buttle,
He fell through the scuttle,
Said the lady, “Dear me, must you go?”

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 1 May 1910. panel 1.]

A lady went hunting a flat,
In a brand new chanticler hat;
Said the landlord, “My dear,
We don’t keep poultry here,”
And she threw him downstairs just for that.

M. Mazie King, Cincinnati, Ohio.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 24 April 1910. panel 4.]

A Maine man in a thicket of spruce
Encountered a four-year-old moose;
Said the critter, “Stand still.”
Said the man, “Yes, I will!”
And proceeded to turn himself loose.

R.K. Nicker, Chicago, Ill.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 24 April 1910. panel 3.]

An ambitious young man of the east,
Drank a two-gallon bottle of yeast.
He rose in such haste
That he quite lost his waist,
Said he, “Goodness, you’d think I was greased.”

J.T. Smith,Springfield, Ill.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 17 April 1910. panel 4.]

A cow, who was munching some clover,
Was bought by a rascally drover,
She called to her mother,
And then her big brother
Approached and performed his chef d’oevre.

Frederick Denton, Chesapeake, Mo.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 17 April 1910. panel 2.]

There was an old woman of Gloucester,
Whose husband supposed he had lost her.
She was found by a dog,
In a cranberry bog,
Where some one had carelessly tossed her.

T.K. Hudson, Toledo, Ohio.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 10 April 1910. panel 4.]

The was once a silly old grafter,
Who suspended himself from a rafter,
His Mother-in law
Gave one loud guffaw
And nearly exploded with laughter.

Charles B. Heney, Omaha, Neb.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 10 April 1910. panel 3.]

The Widow, audacious young Mrs
Said “I really don’t know what a kiss is.”
Her lover said here,
“I will show you, my dear,”
And gently, but firmly, said “this is.”

(Miss) Cherry Rype, Ravenswood, Ill.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 10 April 1910. panel 2.]

There was an old Maid of Berlin
Who was so distressingly thin
She was locked out one day,
So the neighbors all say,
But she pushed out the key and crawled in.

Hardy Kirkling, St. Joel, Mo.

[Foolish Limericks Now and Then are Relished by the Best of Men. Chicago Tribune, 10 April 1910. panel 1.]