Said the spider, in tones of distress:
“As a spinster I’m not a success.
Though I toil and I spin
And I work myself thin,
I never can have a new dress.”
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXVI, August 1913, no. 4, p. 639.]

A camel, with practical views
On the nutritive value of shoes,
To the mosque would repair
While the folks were at prayer,
Little dreaming their soles they would lose.
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXVI, July 1913, no. 3, p. 480.]

“How absurd,” said the gnat to the gnu,
“To spell your queer name as you do!”
“For the matter of that,”
Said the gnu to the gnat,
“That’s just as I feel about you.”
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXVI, July 1913, no. 3, p. 479.]

There once was a kind armadillo,
Who solaced a lone weeping-willow.
Said he: “Do not weep!
What you need is some sleep;
Pray rest on my shell as a pillow.”
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXVI, June 1913, no. 2, p. 320.]

Once a pound-keeper chanced to impound
An ounce that was straying around.
The pound-keeper straight
Was fined for false weight,
Since he’d only one ounce in his pound.
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXVI, May 1913, no. 1, p. 158.]

Said the oyster: “To-morrow’s May-day;
But don’t call me early, I pray.
Just tuck me instead
In my snug oyster-bed,
And there till September I’ll stay.”
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXVI, June 1913, no. 1, p. 157.]

Said a squirrel who raced with a fan:
“You are built on a wonderful plan;
But you’d better take care
Or you’ll lose all you hair.
I advise you to stop, if you can.”
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXV, April 1913, no. 6, p. 962.]

There was a young waitress named Myrtle
Who carried a plate of mock turtle,
When, strange to relate,
She tripped, and the plate
That once was mock turtle turned turtle.
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXV, April 1913, no. 5, p. 961.]

Said the mole: “You would never suppose
How far back my family goes.
The first of my name
From Normandy came
On William the Conqueror’s nose.”
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXV, March 1913, no. 4, p. 802.]

One evening a goose, for a treat,
For the opera purchased a seat.
At the very first line
She exclaimed, “How divine!”
And for hissing was thrown in the street.
[Oliver Herford in The Century Magazine. Vol. LXXXV, February 1913, no. 4, p. 640.]